Poster sizes

Sharks reach enormous sizes thanks to new protections

Good news for sharks and also for me, a shark enthusiast, the sea zaddies are reaching record sizes and turning into absolute MEGA BEASTS because of the fish protection zones. Oh, and they’re also starting to hunt in packs. For my part, I welcome our chonky overlords.

According to marine biologists, protections of endangered sharks and fishing grounds have led to an increase in a) the actual number of sharks and b) the number of fish these sharks feed on.

When added together, what do we get? MEGA SHARKS.

That’s right, these villains are getting bigger and better because they now have a stable food supply that has allowed them to thrive and reach new heights, literally.

Tiger sharks are usually around 3.5 meters long, but a marine biologist Kori Burkhardt spotted one that was five meters long. So it makes sense that the shark was found in French Polynesia – where it has had extra protection for over a decade.

“When we first met Kamakai, it was really unexpected. I’ve dived with tiger sharks in several countries and this is by far the biggest I’ve ever seen,” Burkhardt said, per The mirror.

“It’s not just its length, but also its width.

“She can be five meters long but she is three meters wide, including her fins. That’s crazy.”

For your information, this is the size of a fkn car.

Sharks in French Polynesian waters are thick and thriving due to the abundance of food surrounding them, as they should be.

Great white sharks are also getting bigger. They average around four or five meters long, but scientists are seeing more and more creatures reaching six meters.

They are classified as a vulnerable species due to the effect of climate change on their habitat as well as illegal fishing. BUT, Hawaii banned shark fishing earlier this year and introduced a slew of other protections, which scientists say gave these mega-girls the ability to get super big.

Oh, and now they also hunt in packs due to reduced competition for food, with three large white pointed antlers spotted sharing a whale. Work smarter, not harder, right?

“Find a white shark and a whale, of course”, marine biologist Dr Chris Lowe said.

“Having three female great white sharks on one whale is different.

“This means that these sharks must have been close enough in the vicinity to detect the scent of this whale, and it could also mean that these sharks are traveling together.

“It’s something that we’ve never really been able to study or understand.”

Any humans who have a problem with these animals living their best lives can duel me personally.

And by all humans, I mean specifically some *cough* TheMirror *cough* tabloid posts that have started shaming our big woods, with one article even referring to their height as an “obesity crisis.”

I can’t believe I have to say this but: why shouldn’t they thrive in the ocean, which is literally where they live??? Is it their home??? Imagine trying to shame the “waistline” (yes really) of a SHARK.

The presence of a thriving and populous class of predators is a symptom of a healthy ecosystem and food chain, and we should celebrate these MEGA BEASTS.

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Image: Juan Oliphant / Instagram @juansharks